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Remember when you were a kid, your mom took you to the doctor, and one of the first things he said was, “Stick out your tongue and say ‘Ahhh’.” That’s what James is doing in James 3. Let’s take a good look at that four-inch long muscle hiding in your mouth. Did you monitor your words this week? Were there any verbal regrets? “Now, why did I say that?” We can say with confidence that our tongues tell more about who we are than anything else we do. And James wants us to bring that monstrous member under the control of the Spirit. But he isn’t finished exposing how powerful and vicious it can be.
Warren Wiersbe talks about a Christian fellow who while at work got angry and let a few choice cuss words fly. Embarrassed, he turned to his partner and said, “I don’t know why I said that. It really isn’t me.” His partner wisely replied, “It had to be in you or it couldn’t have come out of you.” Like we said last week, our mouth speaks whatever is filling our hearts. Nothing comes out of our mouth but what was already in our hearts. We know alcohol loosens up tongues. You’ve probably heard some nasty stuff fly out of a drunkard’s mouth. The fact is that his mouth is just unleashing thoughts that were already in his heart. That’s one reason I’m not drinking adult beverages. The heart is deceitful and wicked and I’m afraid of what might come out of my mouth. I have a hard enough time controlling my tongue without loosening it up with a little Jack Daniels.
Last week James told us we all stumble in what we say. If you can control your tongue, you’re doing very well. But your tongue, as small as it is, can be like hell’s flame-thrower, burning people in your path. Your tongue can totally destroy relationships in your life. We need help to control our tongues. This morning we’re looking at three more characteristics of our tongues that remind us that we need the power of the Spirit to control our words. And even more, we the Spirit’s power to purify and control our hearts that drive our tongues.
YOUR TONGUE IS UNTAMABLE
James 3:7-8a For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. 8 But no one can tame the tongue.
James describes two categories of wild beasts that people have tamed: those that walk and fly, and those that crawl and swim. The history of domesticating wild animals is fascinating. They’ve trained elephants to obey commands going into battle. They can gore, stomp, and throw with their trunks. Cyrus the Great used camels to repel horses that couldn’t stand their smell. Lions have been trained to pull chariots. I had a cousin who had a pet crow. Homing pigeons have been used in war to carry messages hundreds of miles. Porpoises have been trained to play better basketball than most of us. K-9 police units have dogs trained to sniff out drugs and pull down bad guys. I love to watch sheep dogs obey their masters instantly. Be careful, though. Dogs may seem tame, but don’t try to take their food away. I speak from experience with one of our former dogs. Our dog Rico is pretty tame, but just let a squirrel scurry across the back yard and Rico forgets all about how domesticated he is. Off he bounds in leaping strides disregarding every obstacle in his way. Our tongues are so much like that. We speak nicely when all is calm and pleasing to us, but let a little squirrel of sin cross us – bam! We’re gone. We said it again!
James’ point is we tame wild animals, but NO MAN CAN TAME THE TONGUE! Why did God give you a tongue? Besides embedding 10,000 taste buds so you can enjoy your food, He gave you your tongue for two main reasons: to praise and worship God and to bless and encourage other people. But that’s just our problem. Just listen to those tongues strutting through the earth, blaspheming God and cursing others. Augustine said, “We tame beasts but cannot tame the beast in our own bosoms,” referring to that wicked heart that drives our tongues. We’ve got major tongue trouble.
YOUR TONGUE IS DEADLY
James 3:8b, It is a restless evil and full of deadly poison.
This is the raw, uncensored description of your tongue. James is emphatic: “A restless evil! Full of deadly poison!” Since the mouth speaks out of what fills the heart and the heart is evil, so evil will come out of the mouth. Lies, blame, and slander are constantly firing from the world’s mouths. Words paint the enemy as wickedly as possible. The ruler of this world started it off with a lie – “You surely will not die.” Jesus called him the original murderer and father of lies. No sooner had sin entered the human race than Adam used his tongue to blame and slander, “The woman you gave me.” We’ve been doing it ever since. The three characteristics of our politicians’ words while our nation is in a tailspin are: Deny, Blame, Divert. “It’s not our fault; it’s their fault; look over there.”
The human tongue is a restless evil – that’s its nature; full of deadly poison – that’s its effect. Let me give you two pictures for your imagination. A restless evil, always active, you never know what he’ll say, like a sword that just keeps cutting people up into little pieces; full of death-bearing poison, a deadly serpent that bites and injects his venom into his victim.
Instead of using tongues to glorify Christ, you hear the restless whining and griping and cursing and muttering and slandering and gossiping and putdowns and lies and filthy, sensual talk, cursing God and others. Behind closed doors or out of earshot of respected people someone says just the wrong thing and the bloodletting begins, barking and screaming out of an uncontrolled temper.
That tongue can be worse than a syringe full of poison. Albert Barnes writes:
There is no sting of a serpent that does so much evil in the world; there is no poison more deadly to the frame than the poison of the tongue is to the happiness of man. Who, for example, can stand before the power of the slanderer?
How many marriages and families have been mortally wounded by this hypodermic needle in our mouths? Bitter words and arguments of anger between divorcees. Harsh words between an impatient father and a disobedient son. “I’ve never been able to trust you. You’ll never amount to anything.” The restless sword and the poisonous syringe keep cutting and poisoning. I’m not on Twitter, but I’ve read some vicious, slanderous tweets. I read several the other day attacking two congresswomen I respect with the worse slander imaginable. I’d say Twitter proves the human tongue is worse than deadly beasts.
David cries to God to protect him from violent men. Psalms 140:2-3, “Who devise evil things in their hearts; They continually stir up wars. 3 They sharpen their tongues as a serpent; Poison of a viper is under their lips.” And Proverbs 12:18, “There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword.” And Proverbs 11:9, “With his mouth the godless man destroys his neighbor.”
Why is the tongue a restless evil and full of deadly poison and no human can tame it? Because that’s what’s in the heart. The natural man’s heart is evil and poisoned by sin so that’s what comes out. Until you get a new heart, your tongue will not be used for why God created it. Plus, we so easily develop sinful habits of speech. You can listen to someone spew out bitter words and then come back ten years later and you’ll hear the same thing, unless God does that miracle of giving them a new heart through faith in Christ.
YOUR TONGUE IS DUPLICITOUS
James 3:9-12, With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; 10 from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. 11 Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh.
What do I mean by duplicitous? Exactly what James says in verse nine. We have trained our tongues to say what we know people want to hear. We can be here at church and use our voices to praise and worship God, or at least it sounds like it. Then on the way home we fight and bicker and argue or, horrors of horrors, have roast preacher even before you get to the table. Just like 1 John 4:20 says that you can’t hate people and love God, James says you can’t bless God and curse people who are made in God’s likeness. That’s a powerful truth. Cursing others meant you wish they’d be cut off from God and experience eternal punishment. How often have people used the curse, “Go to __________.” Genesis 9:6 says a murderer is to be executed because he murdered someone made in God’s image. Whenever we curse people with our tongues, we are attacking God whose likeness men still bear.
James cuts to the quick in verse 10b, “My brothers, these things ought not to be!” Or as R. C. Sproul would say, “What’s wrong with you people?” Something is dreadfully wrong. You are being duplicitous – double-tongued.
James almost mocks them with his illustrations from nature to drive his point home. You don’t get this duplicity in nature. Fig trees produce one thing – figs. Grape vines produce one thing – grapes. Salt water produces what? Salt water. And yet our sinful forked tongues can both bless and curse at the same time. That’s how twisted our sinful hearts are! We’ve got a real mess on our hands. How do we turn these slicing and dicing swords into instruments of blessing? How do we replace this deadly poison into life-giving grace? How do we tame these untamable tongues?
HOW DO YOU TAME YOUR TONGUE?
First, you’ve got to have a redeemed tongue, and that means you’ve got to have a redeemed heart, and that means you’ve got to have a Redeemer who rules your heart and your tongue. As tough as it is to bring our tongues under the Lordship of Christ, God says we need to change how we speak, how we use our tongues. This change comes by the power of the cross and the Spirit of God as we prayerfully and carefully apply the Word of God every day to our lives. We must be aware of our words and retrain ourselves to use our tongues to praise and glorify God and to bless and edify others.
Second, you need to retrain your tongue, and this is where it isn’t easy. We still have hidden reserves of evil and poison in our hearts and we can so easily and quickly go down there and grab some and inject it or spray it on others! Here’s one verse if obeyed that will help us make huge strides in getting a grip on these slippery muscles in our mouths. Turn to Ephesians 4:29, where Paul gives us a four-fold method for retraining our tongues.
Ephesians 4:29, Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear.
First, refrain and restrain your words. Unwholesome means rotten or unfit for use. We all know what a rotting mouse or a rotten potato smell like. Imagine that smell blowing out of your mouth when tempted to say stinky, filthy words that defile others. That includes dirty barnyard words, but in this context they are words that hurt, attack, and wound. Do everything you can to stop any rotten, corrupting, critical, slanderous, harsh, inflammatory words from flying out of your mouth. Stop and think before you speak. What am I about to say? Why? Will it honor the Lord? Or will it hurt, embarrass, defile, dice and slice, offend, grieve, or destroy my testimony for Jesus Christ? “But this guy just told me to take a hike and I can’t let him get away with it.” Wait a minute. Remember your Lord who rules your heart? When He was slandered and insulted, He returned good for evil; He didn’t revile in return (1 Peter 2:23). God calls you and me to return blessing for evil! That’s a redeemed tongue.
Second, aim your words to build up others, not tear them down. Use encouraging, helpful words that speak truth.
Third, use your words to meet the needs of others. What is this person dealing with? Maybe they are tired or weary in well doing or just could use a word of encouragement. Marriages flourish with good words. Proverbs 31:12, “She does him good (including her words) and not evil all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:28-29, “Her husband praises her, ‘Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.’” Ask God to help you make your words helpful, not hurtful; hopeful, not harmful.
Use lots of grace in your words. Gracious words are motivating and encouraging to go on serving Christ. When someone speaks grace into your life, they help you see God, remind you that God is in your trial, and that God has a purpose. Colossians 4:6, “Let your words be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer every person.” This certainly doesn’t mean we validate anyone in their sinful behavior. Giving grace includes speaking truth and sometimes rebuking. Jesus rebuked His enemies and called Herod a fox. We should respect people as image bearers and not curse them. Look for opportunities to point them to Christ.
That doctor who examined your tongue as a child could tell a lot by just looking at it. So what do you see as you examine your tongue today? Is it an instrument of praise to God and blessing to others? Are you committed to retraining your tongue by the grace of God and by the power of God’s Spirit because you are redeemed by the blood of Christ? Do you want to use your tongue for God’s purposes of blessing Him and for building and blessing and meeting the needs of others? J. Sidlow Baxter wrote, “One of the first things that happens when a man is really filled with the Spirit is not that he speaks with tongues, but that he learns to hold the one tongue he already has.” Thank God there is forgiveness for our sins of the tongue. But we need to take verbal inventory and like David pray Psalms 141:3.
Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips.